I picked up Stephen Denning's The Secret Language of Leadership with great interest. It's a provocative title. Curious minds want to know, just what is the secret language leaders use, or should use?
Denning sets up a straw man, an uninspiring leader who tries to lead through logic. This (imaginary) leader presents facts and expects people to follow. But they don't.
Why? Because we're distracted and it takes more than facts to get us to pay attention.
What does it take? It takes emotion, and an understanding of our needs as followers. Beyond that, it takes a dollop of authenticity and a sprinkling of charisma.
Here's my take on the secret language leaders should use: begin by realizing that followers need to be respected, and they have to decide to follow a leader, to enlist in the cause the leader is espousing.
A decision is a measurable activity. It follows certain steps. And it's emotional. Here's how it works.
First, something has to get our attention: let's say our car breaks down on the highway for the umpteenth time.
We've had it with the old clunker! We go through an emotional reaction to the misery of finding ourselves stuck on the highway. That's what motivates us to change. We wait for AAA to tow us to safety. Time to research new models — and our ability to pay for them.
Eventually, we close in on a model. We convince ourselves it's the best thing on wheels. We find a dealer, and grimly haggle over a price, expecting to get taken to the automotive cleaners.
But eventually we end up with a new car, and leaders should use the equivalent of this secret language when persuading followers of the importance of the cause.
Get our attention. Get emotional; persuade us that there's something wrong, or that something could be better, or both. Help us explore the problem and look for alternatives. Settle in on a new way forward. Then, talk up the benefits of that way, so we can get over the hurdle of changing our minds. Then, get us moving on the new path.
That's the secret language: Attention, problem, emotion, decision-making, and action. Understand your followers and your ideas from that point of view, and you can be a leader. Add in authenticity and charisma, and you can be a great one.
Agree with the secret language. I tell my clients – “Charm, Teach, Move” (From the Orator Cicero). These three steps are the key to being a persuasive speaker. These steps must be followed and need to be done in that order.