A recent research result was reported in the media as indicating that there may be something called “approach aversion” that people instinctively have toward people and objects coming toward them. My first reaction, when I read this, was really? Cake? Ice Cream? If only I had approach aversion to those delicious items my dietary problems would be solved.
More seriously, the research has interesting implications for speakers because it poses the question, should you move toward people when you speak, stand still, or move away? The research would seem to indicate that you should move away.
Until, that is, that you unpack the actual study and dig a little deeper into its implications.
The study showed participants videos of strangers walking away and toward the camera. The subjects reacted more positively to the strangers walking away from the camera.
What’s interesting about that is that it is precisely at odds with how we feel when people that we know (and love) approach us. From infancy onward, when we cry at Mommy or Daddy leaving us, we like it when familiar things get closer and unfamiliar things move away.
So what’s the deal for speakers? You want to connect with audiences. Don’t be misled by “approach aversion.” Instead, get familiar with your audience. You have already been introduced to them; you are a known quantity. Make use of that familiarity, build on it, and connect positively with your audience.
What happens when we approach each other is that we raise interest levels. We go on our guard, or we anticipate pleasure, but we raise our interest. So make sure that, as a speaker, you’re on the latter end, not the former, and create a strong positive connection with your audience, use it to maintain interest, and enjoy the warmth that comes from human interaction when we’re all looking forward to the encounter.
A part of this post is adapted from my new book, Power Cues: The Subtle Science of Leading Groups, Persuading Others, and Maximizing Your Personal Impact, published May 13, 2014 by Harvard. You can order it here.
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