Do you believe that giving a speech is an honor or a gift? Should the audience be grateful that you’ve made the effort, or should you be grateful that they’ve shown up?
The correct answer is all of the above, surely. And as such, and especially in this virtual era, getting a group of people together is an occasion to be celebrated at the very least. And also continued in a variety of ways after the fact. How can you keep the effect of an event alive, and avoid the all-too-common phenomenon of the “mountaintop experience” where the glow of the event quickly fades? And how can you take care of yourself? Following are three ways to give your speech an afterlife, and three ways to keep the wear and tear on you to a minimum. First, the afterlife.
Come for the speech, stay for the connections. While you’re still high on adrenaline, work the crowd, take the selfies, get out the tweets, and generally do what you can to extend the virtual life of your real event. George Bernard Shaw was famous for writing glowing reviews of his own plays, even when their success was minimal. I don’t recommend such subterfuges in the digital era, but you don’t have to. Now you can get participants other than yourself to carry the ball for you. Get the Twitter machine cranking.
But don’t do the ‘humble brag’. I think the time for that maneuver is past; I may be in a minority on this call, but I don’t care. I find statements on social media like, “so humbled to receive the Most Magnificent Lifetime Achievement Award in front of 10,000 of my most personal friends!” to be repulsive, and transparently so. It’s part of what makes more time spent on Facebook more depressing for the rest of us – don’t add to it.
Follow up with contests, trivia games, blog posts, ongoing emails and newsletters to participants that give you their email address, and so on. One way to make a speech into a real conversation is to bring the audience in after the fact (with their permission). Invite them to opt-in for a series of ongoing interactive opportunities. Only to be limited by your imagination and the enthusiasm of your audience.
Then, the self-care.
Don’t ask for critiques for at least 24 hours. Don’t fall for the “while it’s fresh in my mind” trap from someone who offers you (even) a friendly critique. It’s too fresh in your mind. You need to get a little distance so that you can hear the suggestions for improvement with dispassion and clarity. While the adrenaline lasts, all you can truly stand to hear is (genuine) praise.
Once the post-event hoopla is over, change the subject. You need to allow the adrenaline cycle to play itself out completely. So get some exercise, meditate, watch a movie or a favorite TV show, read a book, go for a walk in tranquil – or distracting – surroundings. Whatever works best for you not to keep working, do that.
Finally, let it go. I struggle with this one, so it’s advice to myself as much as to anyone who reads this piece. You can’t change what’s past. Of course, you want to learn from what went well and what didn’t, but don’t carry either the sense of invulnerability or tragedy with you if at all possible. Just. Let. It. Go. Last time I checked, there’s absolutely nothing you can do to change the past.
Follow these tips to extend the life of the speech and the speaker – in good ways.
Nick, thanks for the reminder of the selfies. I’m no good on this one. Forget it every time. Will have to work on that one.
It’s the single best way to make virtual personal connections. And people appreciate them.
Hi Nick, One thing I do is review social media, especially Twitter for my Twitter ID (@dmscott) as well as the hashtag of the event. Depending on the size of the crowd and the nature of the talk, the back channel can be huge. I make it a point to reply and retweet and comment as appropriate and my goal is to do so within an hour or two after I’ve left the stage. It can take time, at an event earlier this week there were well over 100 Twitter mentions alone, but it is important to engage people quickly because Twitter is a real-time media.
David, thanks for the insights. And you’re absolutely right about Twitter being a perishable commodity. Time zones matter too. I was speaking last night in San Francisco, and got done with the reception after at about 10:00 pm local time. That put me at 1:00 am East Coast time — hardly peak Twitter.
This is fresh and important advice, Nick. I esp like and agree with the increasingly common humble brag. It drives me bonkers. That makes at least two of us in this minority.
We’ve started a movement. Let it begin with us.
Hey Nick, great post, I think the area of ‘post-presentation’ isn’t covered enough in public speaking training + education.
In regards to your point, ‘Don’t ask for critiques for at least 24 hours’, what I’ve done is proactively asked someone to critique my presentation a few days before the big day. On the day, I gave them a clipboard with several questions regarding my ‘performance’ per se and expect them to give the answers back to me after it’s finished. My ego is still intact and I’m expecting warts and all feedback relatively dispassionately from the get-go.
What do you think of this approach?
Come for the speech, stay for the connections. Yes! The relationships we form are the frosting on the cake. No. Wait. Maybe they ARE the cake.
“so humbled to receive the Most Magnificent Lifetime Achievement Award”
People get confused between the words “honored” and “humbled.”
Being told you talk stinks is humbling. Getting an award is an honor…
Thanks, Mark. Good luck with changing the usual usage on that one from “humble brag” to “honored brag.”:-)
Nick,
I have hired many speakers throughout the years. Your recommendations are words to live by. I always tried to schedule a break after the keynote so participants could connect, but some speakers just parachuted in and left right after the speech. They were soon forgotten.
Thanks, Tina — I appreciate the insight from your perspective.