We are all above average.  At least, the studies show that most of us think we are above average.  This psychological marvel, known as “illusory superiority,” shows up in a wide variety of human activities, including driving ability, health, memory, and IQ.  In fact, 93 percent of us think we are above-average drivers.

I’m assuming that you recall enough high-school math to know that we can’t all be that good.  Alas, we are more average than we think.

For speakers, this feeling of superiority is particularly dangerous, because adrenaline heightens certain of our sensory responses, leading to above-average feelings of exultation when we’re done.  The sweet feelings of relief to be off the stage start to combine with our adrenaline to give us a post-speech buzz that makes the whole experience feel more significant to us than it possibly could to the audience.

One of my first speech assignments as a Governor’s speechwriter at the start of my career was to a group of farmers in the southern part of the state.  I was very excited for the speech (in a second-hand way) and after it was done, I went buzzing up to audience members to poll them on their feelings.  The very first person I talked to gave me a cold dose of reality in response to my excited questions about this or that policy point in the speech.

“Nick,” he said, after I introduced myself and asked my questions, “Folks down here don’t give a shit who the governor is, let alone all that stuff you’re asking about.  All they care about is the price of hogs.”

He said the word “hogs” with a kind of relish and meaning that told me what really mattered in his life and the life of the people around him.

It was an above-average response to an average speech.  Especially because the speechwriter had been more concerned with the policies than the audience, and that’s a clear danger of those feelings of above-averageness.

Speakers need to be inoculated against the above-average disease.  Here are three quick ways to prevent your thinking from becoming full of illusory superiority. 

1. Connect with the audience before and after the speech. If you establish a real relationship with the audience, asking them what they know about your message (before and after), and what they might do differently after hearing it, are two good questions to keep you grounded and the feedback real.
2. Watch your video 48 hours later. Wait until the adrenaline subsides, then sit down with a note pad and an honest attitude, and critique yourself.  Feedback in the middle of your cool-down period, just after the presentation, is not particularly useful for most us, because we hear it in threat mode.  After 48 hours, you can be as rational as you like.
3. Keep refreshing your content. The world keeps moving on, and every field today has a shorter and shorter half-life.  Keep yourself immersed in your field of expertise and stay humble (and informed) by regularly updating your content.

Speakers need to fight against illusory superiority.  Just as we are all not superior drivers, we are not all superior speakers.  But we can get better by working at our craft and maintaining a realistic attitude.